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Feeling depressed after an hour of browsing the internet? Is the wrist of your right hand paining every time you get up from your computer? Beware; you might be suffering from Browser’s Carpal Syndrome.

Researchers and psychiatrists at Zeal Unfocusd Inc. have discovered this startling and manic depressive and personality syndrome that many internet surfers suffer from. The syndrome is triggered by excessive clicking of the mouse on the left side navigation menu using the right hand.

Scientific Reasons

As a Browser, you may find it most comfortable to find the navigation menu of any webpage on the left hand side and most of the browsers are right handed. But this is the most detestable thing for your brain because it creates an oculo-motor conflict in the Central Carpal of the Cerebellum. When the eye is looking to the left, the neuro-transmitters produce oxitocin, a hormone that activates the left side of the body. But when you are using right hand to click on the left visible image in your brain, the oxytocin is in conflict with neurotocin, the right side enabling motor hormone. And the resulting conflict puts the central carpal under stress and the carpal goes into temporary hibernation. Since carpal is a depression creating part of the brain, it naturally numbs the activity of brain to protect it from the onslaught conflict.

Result

As a result, when we are happily clicking away on the outside, we are growing number and depressive by the moment on the inside and we have triggered the Browser’s Carpal Syndrome.

Symptoms

The symptoms of the syndrome include depression (ranging from very mild to manic), nausea, numbness, sleepiness or sleeplessness, body pains especially the knees and right wrist, a sensation of numbness in the neck, weightlessness. Severe cases include vomiting, indigestion and manic depression that could lead to suicidal thoughts and actions.

Doctors say the only way to prevent the syndrome is to avoid browsing sites with left menu or if you are a left hander then avoid right menu web pages.a

So next time you see a left menu website, you better think twice before clicking!

Note: All of the above is humbug, rattails, mudgulley, claptrap and scientific horse puckey. So you cannot sue me! Ha ha ha!